Cowboys, tissues, and exes. Yes, we took it there.

Conferencing during Independent Reading:
Mr. Hatcher: Yeah, these parts are kind of difficult to read because this character has an accent.
Boy: Why doesn't he just talk normal?
Mr. Hatcher: He's from the south. You have to get into it. He's a cowboy. They talk funny.
Boy: Yeah, 'cause they are always saying "Yodel-ay-hee-hoo" to everybody.

In reading group:
Boy: (playing with a kleenex; separates it into two thinner kleenexes and shows it off to the kid next to him)
Girl: (trying to share a book about minerals that she doesn't really know anything about, but at least she is trying and is interested) And this is like a sapphire or something and they have diamonds all around it.
Kleenex Boy: Oh those are for old people! I'm just playing. I'm gonna get one for my grandma when she's old.
Other Kid Being Shown Kleenex: Grandmas are old.
Mineral Girl: (trying to go on about other pictures in her book; the sapphire and diamonds were totally an emerald only)
Kleenex Boy: OH MY GOSH!! IT'S 3-PLY!!!!

As we are cleaning up and getting ready to go:
Girl: Is Ms. Finished your ex-girlfriend?
Mr. Hatcher: Excuse me?
Girl: Did you hug her before?
Mr. Hatcher: Uh... I mean, well I hug a lot of people I know.
Girl: 'Cause 'Sally' saw you hugging and she made up a song about you.
Mr. Hatcher: 'Sally', what's the song I hear you made up?
'Sally': ?
Mr. Hatcher: I hear you made up a song.
Boy: He wants you to sing (whispers in her ear).
'Sally': Oh... "Applebottom jeans and boots with the fur"...

*Side note: I don't know how 'Sally' has seen a hug? None have taken place at school. What the hell?

Apparently Kleenex Boy knocked another kid over at lunch, which then made that kid get all dizzy, which then made that kid's mom come to pick him up. Now Kleenex Boy has to spend recess with the Vice Principal. I wonder if she has kleenex.